Does this smell like chloroform?

I was reading an article today, "28 sexy things to try in bed" from Redbook magazine, and was honestly very surprised at how mundane and seemingly obvious the sexy things were. It suggested things like sleeping in the buff, getting sexy underwear, playing dress up, and going out on a date. Um, old news. Doesn't everybody already know about this stuff ? Okay, granted, I did not know there was a website where you could get a Swarovski crystal stick-on tattoo for "down there " ( ouch !), but everything else was pretty boring. For this I spent $3.99 ?
One of the tips was being well groomed. Do people think it's okay to NOT be well groomed ? Is that one of the first things that goes ? Grooming tips are easy. 1) Deodorant and shampoo are your friends. 2) Nose hairs are NOT a good thing. 3) No one, man or woman, over 40-years-old show have a ponytail. 4) Moisturize ! This goes for men and women. Scaly skin is a turn off.
5) women, I don't care how "green" you are, razors are your friends. Leg hair and underarm hair are NOT sexy. Yes, I believe in evolution but nobody wants to f### a monkey !
You would think all of this would be obvious, but I guess not since magazines are still writing articles about it and people ( like me ) are still suckered into buying the magazine !

Maybe they should write articles about the top 28 pick up lines instead. My favorite ..... a man holds a napkin/handkerchief up to a woman's face and says "does this smell like chloroform?" Okay, it's funny because if someone holds something up to your face, and asks you to smell it, you usually do. It is almost an instinctual reaction. You sniff without even realizing it. Besides, it's hilarious ! How desperate do you have to be to actually chloroform your date ?

Which leads us to relationship advice. 1) Don't really chloroform your date, or slip drugs in her drink, etc. That's not funny. The rest of my advice is what I need to listen to myself.......2) pay attention when your partner speaks and try to remember what he says. It is important to anyone to feel valued and listened to. 3) Don't let your kids get in the way of your relationship! Don't let it get to a point where it is him/her or the kids. There will be nothing but regret and resentfulness no matter what you choose.