I got a hit on a dating site (scary, I know), and the guy asked to meet me for a cup of coffee. Sounded good so I said yes. Then I got to thinking, does "cup of coffee" really mean cup of coffee, or has that changed too ? Enter urbandictionary.com.
OMG!!!! I was appalled to find out that "cup of coffee" apparently is code for sex, or refers to an orgasm. Imagine my surprise ! Be careful, ladies, when you agree to a cup of coffee with someone !
Other words to watch out for:
"the time" - giving someone "the time" means having sex with them. "Pardon me, do you have the time" is no longer something we can say !
"teabag" - I don't even want to write what this one is. Suffice it to say that includes dunking a body part in someone's mouth.
"toss salad" - When someone asks you what you want to have to eat, NEVER say "I would like a toss salad." This involves licking and rear ends. Lettuce will never be looked at the same way again !
If you want to know other words to avoid, go to urbandictionary.com or ask your teenager ! Now I know why they are always snickering at menus!
As for me, I am going to write back to the dating site, tell the guy there is NO WAY I want to go for coffee, and then perhaps become a mute !
Sigh.
ReplyDeleteAs I have written elsewhere—actually long before Urban Dictionary existed—sometimes a cup of coffee is just a cup of coffee.
It is merely an opportunity, low stakes, to meet someone to see if they are who you expect them to be and to see if, perhaps, there's enough to have a second cup of coffee or maybe dinner. You might even ask yourself—silently, without licking your lips or gagging—whether or not you could see yourself in bed with this person.
But a cup of coffee is not a proclamation of smittenness or infatuation or love. It is not a commitment. It is not a proposal. It is a cup of coffee and some conversation. Do not over think it.
Personally, I've had many cups of coffee over the years. Some have lead to dinner. Others have lead to walks in the park. Some have even, eventually, lead to the cups of coffee that some wag posted in the Urban Dictionary. Still others have caused me (and probably her) to flee in terror.
BTW, classy broads like yourself really shouldn't be hanging out in the Urban Dictionary. ;)